We’re Calling To Tell You We Can’t Call You

Rick and I received the following phone call the other day –

“This is [NAME OF BUSINESS]. We are calling to tell you that we are not allowed to call you, because you are on the “Do Not Call” list. If you really do not want us to call you, we will not call you. But if you would like us to call you to tell you about exciting new products and services, please call us and let us know. Otherwise, we can not call you.”

I … what … but …

Since the folks at [NAME OF BUSINESS] seem to have a hard time grasping the concept of the DO NOT CALL list, I have put it in a more simple way that may make it easier for them to understand.

Do not call me on the phone.
Do not call me at my home.
Do not call when I’m alone.
Do not call when I’m in Rome.
Do not call when I’m at play.
Do not call me when it’s day.
Do not call when I’m at the park.
Do not call me when it’s dark.
Do Not Call means do not call.
Do not call my house at all.

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5 Comments on “We’re Calling To Tell You We Can’t Call You”

  1. Suzie says:

    The company I work for just opened a new office here in Florida. I immediately…like ASAP but our office numbers on the Do Not Call list. But wait, we not only get daily sales calls, we get them in Spanish!

  2. Lani Voivod says:

    Idiots. Idiots, I tell you!

    I have been trying to Unsubscribe from the same email list for the last week. Ironically, they’re supposed to be the savviest of the savviest — MediaPost.com. I was genuinely interested in getting A WEEKLY or MONTHLY newsletter from them, seeing what they have to say about the state of the media, the Internet, the times, etc.

    But ever since I gave them every little detail about me (name, addy, email, industry, name of boy to whom I lost my virginity, etc.) they’ve been sending me MULTIPLE newsletters, missives, ezines, announcements, and advertisements EVERY SINGLE DAY.

    I must’ve visited their Unsubscribe page no fewer than a dozen times this week. Now it’s a source of humor for me, and your blog entry gave me a reason to get it off of my chest.

    They’re MEDIA POST, man! They should KNOW BETTER!

    Thank you, Tara.
    A Content Lover

  3. kellymahanjaramillo says:

    Would anyone like to veer off into the direction of trying to get a credit card company to leave you alone? They have a number to call if you would like to “opt-out” of the pre-screened offers…….

    I have a cauliflower ear from being on hold for so many days.

    Tara knocks it out of the park, again.

  4. Brooke the fellow pickler says:

    Tara, I found you! You are too funny.


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